Mission Accomplished!

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear Diary,

TODAY I WAS SWORN IN AS SECRETARY OF STATE OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!!!!!!! SO AWESOME!!!!! I AM TOTALLY EXCITED!!!!!!!

The senate confirmed me by a vote of 85 to 13!

Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

Secretary of State? Yes, please!

Dear Diary,

I've am so going to have this Secretary of State thing DOWN! I don't know what Colin was always complaining about (and I'm still just a nominee!!!). Today I announced my six "Outposts of Tyranny" -- Cuba, Iran, North Korea, Zimbabwe, Burma and Belarus. (Belarus is good, right? I totally just made that one up to make my outposts an even half dozen). I mean, six nations is so much bigger and better than three. It's like an Asterisk of Evil instead of an Axis!!!! (oooh! I am soooo gooood!)

So okay, since I made the mistake somewhere along the line of saying that as Secretary of State, I wanted to 'make a fresh start in US diplomacy' (mostly because Colin messed everything up, BTW), I got really nervous when a reporter asked me how I was going to do that. But I was really quick on my feet and said something like, "The time for diplomacy is now" and "Our interaction with the rest of the world must be a conversation, not a monologue."

SO GOOD, RIGHT!?!??!?! I wonder when it will be safe to get out that big stick?

AND WHAT?

Dear Diary,

I am SO over these confirmation hearings. Senators are so dumb. I cannot believe the way Barbara Boxer was all up in my grill, like, "You blew it with the tsunami opportunity" and "you misrepresented information about 9/11 and Iraq"....

But luckily, I just remained calm and told her, "Girrrrrl! I KNOW you're not tryining to impune MY integrity!" She is so lame!

And as for the rest of them, I think I definitely convinced them I will be an awesome Secretary of State. I told them I was totally down with working with Israel and Palestine, that we'd keep on Iran and N. Korea to get rid of their nuke programs, and that we'd build a candid, co-operative and constructive relationship with China. I think they bought it! Plus I totally stood firm on the administration's military operations in Iraq.

Anyway, I really, really, really hope the Senate Foreign Relations Committee votes me in!!!!