I'll give you a "manhandle" upside your head!

Dear Diary,

I AM SO MAD! I can't believe the Sudanese Presidential security staff tried to cockblock my people! I mean, I drag my ass to Khartoum to talk to President Omar al-Beshir, and then while we're meeting, his posse is all up in the my US reporters and officials' business. WTF? Don't these people know Americans are untouchable? I mean, if we wanna ask about the death of 180,000 people over the last two years, we're gonna.

Whatevs -- I'm off to go get down with the 2 million Darfur refugees. Genocide is so early nineties.