Africa unite...

Dear Diary,

I think it is so awesome that our fearless Defense Secretary, Donald Rumsfeld, is thinking about Africa. I mean, I think it could be really useful to have a U.S. military presence on the continent, so we can guard against potential threats to our glorious Democracy. We don’t want to have to deal with the fall-out from Africa’s war-ravaged, famine-plagued, malaria-carrying, very-thirsty people – especially when they are coming from huge expanses of ungoverned territory. It’s just such quick thinking that if we get in now, we can prevent other situations like Iraq. The last thing we need is an increased presence of Al Qaeda in the Heart of Darkness; the Islamic fundamentalism that’s increasing all over the place is a totally bad sign.